Day 335 - Leigh Ann's Birthday today
She would have been 36 years old. How much I loathe writing "would have been." One year ago she was alive and well, we were all wishing her a happy 35th. A supervisor in nursing, a mother of three, happily married, looking forward to whatever else life had for her. Leigh Ann was someone you wanted to be around and you especially loved being around her on this day because it was one of the few days when you could brag on her and there was nothing she could do about it.
Malia crawled into bed with me around six this morning. Still in a sleepy state of mind I almost whispered, "Happy Birthday Sug." I've had the pleasure for 13 years to say those words so it's a hard habit to break.
Malia doesn't understand why we're not going to have balloons and cake and presents. I think the obvious has escaped her - there's no one here to open the presents and blow out the candles. The Person of Honor is gone. A surreal day which has gone from years of celebrating with family and friends to now stopping by a cemetery to remember what was.
The kids and I made our way to the grave site this afternoon picking up some balloons and flowers along the way. When we arrived we noticed several others had already stopped by leaving tokens of their love. A complete tragedy when family and friends are leaving flowers and cards on a gravestone instead of handing them to someone at a party. First birthday I've been a part of that was anything but enjoyable.
We cried a lot then prayed, each of us letting Leigh know how much we miss her. The kids headed to the van and I stayed by the grave for just a few minutes longer. I wanted some alone time and though I should've wished her a Happy Birthday the only words that could come out in between the sobs were how much I hate this new life.
Why God would allow such a person to leave us so early I'll never quite understand.
I missed wishing you a Happy Birthday today Sug.
My heart goes out to you and your children, I am not sure how I would handle all this if it were me, but I know your story has opened so many followers, that LOVE is so powerful, people should tell there LOVED ones everyday just how much they are LOVED, you have showed us just how fast it can be gone, thanks again you are a BLESSING!
ReplyDeleteOh Greg - my heart breaks again. I just can't imagine. Her memory lives on in so many ways. Blessings of peace on you, brother.
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